I am a gamer. I’m also a 36 year old gamer that’s been in and around online gaming for the last 25 years. For the last few months I’ve had way too many encounters while playing online, where a simple >>Hi!<< in voice chat by a female sounding teammate caused some very disturbing reactions. This needs to stop.
The typical responses I’ve heard vary from “Hey, how old are you?” to “Do you have an onlyfans?” to “Where do you live?” or “How old are you?”. Those are the calm yet still creepy oneliners that usually tell me: Someone isn’t using his brain but just switched into dickmode.
Those questions have nothing to do with the game. Nothing to do with the player on the other side of the monitor. Those questions are personal and are absolutely unimportant, unnecessary and are a distraction from what the game is about.
Some of these creeps then go on to harass the person during the match. They follow her around, they go out of their way to play differently, they drop weapons, they try to look cool or make snarky comments if their “target” wants so personal training or private sessions. Sometimes they even offer to help carry them to higher ranks and boost them.
Other times they become pissy or even angry if they’re not being answered. They start trolling, insulting and sometimes outright throwing the game. Making everyone else on the team lose, because they can’t keep their dick out of their own mouth.
I’m not one of those female players, I’m an old (compared to most teammates) dude that’s sick of guys in online games playing with their dicks out and losing their mind just because there is a female voice in voice chat. I’m calling those guys out – EVERY SINGLE TIME – and it’s way too often these days.
We want those women to play the same games we do. We all want to share this hobby with many people around the world and I totally understand that some of these (mostly younger) dudes dream of having a “gamer girlfriend”.
Spoiler Alert: You don’t get a gamer girlfriend by being a creep towards girls & women that game.
You have a lot higher chance of finding a girlfriend that’s into games if you let females actually enjoy gaming without being harassed or hit on every few games. They just want to play their game, they’re not there for your enjoyment, not there to make you feel better about yourself or to promote their onlyfans account to you.
Just play and let play. You wouldn’t hit on every single female person you meet when outside in the streets just because she’s there? Or would you? CREEP!
Gaming needs to be more of a safe space without having to be afraid to say something, anything on voice chat. And it’s upon us to make it so.
There is absolutely no reason to be THAT guy. Never. Stop it. Today is the first day of 2023 and I hope that I reach at least a few that might reflect on their own behaviour and change. To all the others who aren’t creeps: Call them out. Make them feel bad for doing this. Don’t stand by and ignore it. Don’t silently agree while abuse is happening. Don’t just mute and go on. Stand up, be loud. Fight back.
It’s not about being a white knight. It’s about making this stop. It’s about making online gaming safe and normal for everyone. No matter the gender, age, sexuality. It’s also so normal people can just play the game and enjoy it without having half the team distracted.
We still have a long way to go while people are still using gay as a slur and other homophobic, racist, sexist and similar insults are used regularly, but we can start today by checking our own behavior and at least give our teammates the possibility to enjoy the same thing we do.